
Yes losers, I have kindly taken a photo of the actual occurence of one of the highly intellectual activites that the loser club regularly engages in, given the convenient siting of our CT bench. As attached below, you will comprehend how the watch-the-grass-grow division is growing day by day as more people discover for themselves the true pleasure of grass-watching.
Wow aren't you amazed by how their attention is so undivided and focussed?!
*horrors* Xiang-jie is not paying attention! Note to LCP, maybe you should do something about it? ^^
& lastly, leaving you guys with this:
08A10! <3
- Vanessa
posted by 08A10 at
10:32 PM
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posted by 08A10 at
9:46 PM
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NEWSFLASH: President of Loser's Club pays home visitation to the Vice-President of the Loser's Club, supposedly to work on their Econs ILP. However, as seen from the above picture, there are many questions left unanswered by this seemingly innocuous home visit by the President to the Vice-President.
First, the President claims with much glee and delight (as evidenced from the above picture) that he is going to "[screw the Vice-President's] house up". Which is perfectly legitimate and reasonable, seeing as that it was the Vice-President's choice to invite the President over, and the Vice-President should necessarily bear all consequences of this home visitation made by the President. And of course, how the President be the President of the Loser's Club if he doesn't screw up his first home visitation made to his Vice-President?
However, the Vice-President claims otherwise: that the President is "screwing [the Vice-President's] house"! While it may never be known if this was an unintentional grammatical oversight on the part of the Vice-President, or this is meant to be interpreted the way it's read, one thing's for sure: the Vice-President is alleging that the President is having some form of torrid and adulterous sexual relations with the Vice-President's house!
While he may still be the President of the Loser's Club, this is indeed a whole new low for the President: to be caught in flagrante delicito with an inanimate object; a house no less! However, given that the President is the President of THE Loser's Club after all, it still remains to be seem if such an affair would only strengthen or weaken his power in the Loser's Club.
- Luey Chun
posted by 08A10 at
11:32 PM
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Believe me, I am of the opinion that a discussion on how Turkish politics is recently shifting towards the liberation of the role of religion in the Turkish society from the constraints placed upon it by Turkish secularism may effect a ripple effect of destabilising socio-economic and political influence both domestically and regionally, is much more productive and constructive than me posting cynical articles exaggerating the differences between the two genders, but hey, who cares when you get the helluva laugh from whatever I post? =p
So, here's Part 3, and this time round, it may be slightly inappropriate, but then again, that's the price you need to pay for a little bit of raw humour in your life. :D
The Top Ten "He Said, She Said" One Liners
10
He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said...You wear briefs, don't you?9
She said...What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
He said... It's not my fault...I ran out of money.8
He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
She said...Well, you succeeded.7
He said... "Two inches more, and I would be king."
She said..."Two inches less, and you'd be queen."6
On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."5
He said... "Shall we try a different position tonight?"
She said..."That's a good idea. You stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart. "4
Priest... "I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband."
She said..."Who's gonna look?"3
He said... "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?"
She said... "Turn sideways and look in the mirror."2
He said... "Let's go out and have some fun tonight."
She said..."Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on."... and the number one "He Said...She said"...
1
He said... "Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She said... "I would, but you're never there."
- Luey Chun
posted by 08A10 at
11:56 AM
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posted by 08A10 at
9:19 PM
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posted by 08A10 at
7:00 PM
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Since this is a new intiative by Shao itwin1337, the pre-requisites of the division are entirely up to her to set, and the running of this division is designated to her so that she can fulfill her deepest and most carnal desires by manipulating the members of this division. Lalala...
Lastly, I would like to take this opportunity to introduce everyone to a new term in our Loser Club lingo. Some of you might have heard of it; however, I believe this term deserves an official introduction.
From now onwards, all of the heads of the various divisions in the Loser Club shall be respectfully addressed as 'Fag Head'. Much like the way we bow to teachers when we see them walking towards us in the hallway with canes and dangerous looks on their faces, all inconsequential members of the Loser Club are to bow and greet them with a "Good morning/afternoon/night, Fag Head :)" whenever they run into a Fag Head.
Apart from looking after their respective divisions, all Fag Heads have the added responsibility of organizing 'Fag Dance Sessions', a joyous occasion in which everyone from your division get to experience the wondrous sensations of random arm twitching and torso spasms. The organization of such sessions are up to the discretion of the Fag Heads.
So concludes this update of the Loser Club 2008. Remember to check constantly for more updates :)
LOSER CLUB UNITE!!1! WOOSH!
Loser Club 2008
'We are the stepping stones that people step on to climb to greater heights'
posted by 08A10 at
4:39 PM
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As a follow-up to yesterday's post, today's Pt. 2! How ever so exciting. In any case, today's post also specifically caters to the male gender minority in our class, especially when it comes to dealing with girls. So keep quiet and pay attention, little boys, if you don't want to screw things up! ;)
SourceUnderstanding A Woman's Language
Keyword
Meaning"Fine"
This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments."Five minutes"
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade."Nothing"
This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine"."Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"."Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.(loud sigh)
This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. She thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".(soft sigh)
Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content."Oh"
This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them."That's Okay"
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble."Please Do"
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"."Thanks"
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome."Thanks a lot"
This is much different from "Thanks". A woman will say, "Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".
posted by 08A10 at
11:23 AM
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posted by 08A10 at
9:07 PM
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My first post to the class blog, and what better way to start off on a fine note, other than to post some of the funny shit that I have hidden away in my stash I call my laptop!
This one specially goes out to the boys in 08A10! Be sure of your masculinity and don't be afraid to affirm it (especially you Shen Hong! It disturbs me when you get a girlfriend who looks like a...), even when you are the minority gender in the class! =D
SourceThe International Rules of Manhood
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.
25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below.
"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"
"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!"
We hope this clears up any confusion.
The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.
posted by 08A10 at
12:55 PM
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posted by 08A10 at
12:46 PM
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Heyy all, Vice President of Loser Club at your service. :)
Considering that our honorary president has recently concussed himself on a lamppost, and is therefore in no condition to attempt any publication activities of any sort, it is my duty as Vice-President to take over temporarily so as to ensure that the club does not wallow in the dark abyss of inactivity.
To start off, I shall update on the various sub-divisions that the Loser Club has come up with, so as to cater to as much of our consumers as possible.
1. The 'Omg-shit-I-failed-Mathes/Math' Division'.
This division of the Loser Club is highly prestigious, and therefore we have deliberately made the entry requirements as stringent as possible. The pre-requisites are as follows
- Must be able to fail 70% of their Mathes/Math test in any given year, irregardless of the standard or level of the educational institution the student is/was based in, or the difficulty of the test itself. Candidates whom have failed their 2007 end-of-years will be given top priority.
-Must be able to enter Mathes/Math lessons and come out of it thinking 'O shit, I juz stoned/slept thru the entire lesson. O well, i dun really give much of a shit'. Or alternatively, you can come out of the lesson worried about your performance, and attempt to mug, but end up failing anyway. If so, we will take you in as a member IMMEDIATELY.
-Must have the ability to self-initiate a blank out whenever coming into contact with numbers of any sort.
-Must have an intense dislike/phobia for the subject.
As can be seen, while 4 is easy to accomplish, the other 3 above it are far from mundane abilities that can be achieved through strength of mind and will alone. One must have the innate potential to screw up their Mathes/Math, and that is what we are looking for. HAHA that means you can't join, LC. You can go s*ck my B*LLS!!
2. The 'Watching-the-grass-grow-is-so-interesti
A significantly easier and less demanding division to enter. Basically, activities the division will be involved in, would be, as the name implies, watching the grass grow. It is an immensely satisfying and educational activity, as one would be able to observe the slow growth of the greenery for themselves, whilst admiring their spirit of not yielding to anything which may obstruct their growth.
Anyone can apply for this division, although we must tell you that those with the ability to stone will be held in much higher regard then the rest of the members. We have already identified the potential 'stoners' through various observations and detailed experimentation carried out in the lecture theatres or auditorium; however their identities shall remain hidden so as to ward off any assasination attempts, in lieu of the not-so recent incident in which Benazir Bhutto was murdered secretly via a combination of random objects, some of which include an alarm clock, an eye-patch, and a wooden toothpick.
So concludes the update on the various divisions we have set up. Rest assured that the Loser Club will come up with more random and dumb divisions to engage you stupid retards more of the student population.
Now, I shall brief all current existing members on the club activities, which will take place at random times and random locations next week.
1. Find the longest queue in the canteen, queue right up to the front, then head back to the end of the queue, and re[peat the process (Chang Peng I know you've been wanting to do this all your life).
2. Attempt to rob Chejian or Xiang jie of the Newsweek/Ares pullover money. Take extra caution to ensure that you end up being beaten up. Promotions will be considered for members whom end up in a corner of the toilet crying silently.
3. Point at the people throwing frisbees around the school and shout out the most vulgar and crude comment you can think of. All languages are acceptable.
So concludes the updates on the Loser Club 2008. Please know that should you wish to apply for membership into the Loser Club, you would only have to approach either Chang Peng or yours truly, Shen Hong.
So now, LOSER CLUB UNITE!! WOOSH!
Loser Club 2008
'We are the stepping stones that people step on to climb to greater heights.'
posted by 08A10 at
6:34 PM
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posted by 08A10 at
10:28 PM
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posted by 08A10 at
11:41 AM
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Hey 08A10!
Here's the first post on this newly-minted thingum!
Couple of things:
Homework
> Math Tutorial 2 (3 if you're bored, or hidden SMTP talent)
> Study for Econs Test (FRI! OMG!!!!11~!!)
> Fill up blanks in Lit Lecture Notes
* Homework list will be updated diligently, various Subject Reps please inform us of your homework!
Announcements
1) Lit outing this Saturday, 26th of January 2008, 5.45pm. SAM (Correct me if I'm wrong!) WEAR ANYTHING BUT SCHOOL UNIFORM!
2) O Level results out Thursday 24th January 2008, 2pm. BEST OF LUCK TO THEOPHILIA, JOLENE, ABBY AND CLARE! We give you lots of hearts: <33333333>
High School Guys:Please report to HIGH SCHOOL AUDI at 1.50pm to get your results.
3) Not sure if we've paid up for Newsweek? Che Jian/Jolene post your updates!
Random Stuff
1) Class Bench decoration: HAHAHAHAWHOOPSOHNO!
2) Yay tomorrow we end at 12.30!
3) WHOO A10!!!!
Love, Amanda.
posted by 08A10 at
11:02 AM
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